sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize