you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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