I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
