new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, you're like boner-b-gone
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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