How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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