She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
