yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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