Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
