I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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