She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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