other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I have fence marks all over my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I touched a dick in church today
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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