I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
