Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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