his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
