We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just had sex on a roof
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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