Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
