I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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