at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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