Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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