my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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