Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
