So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
