Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
