Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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