It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
