i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
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I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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