So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i think im in europe. pls send help
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
