what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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