Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
