How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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