Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
