I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
