Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Randomize
