I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
