party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
