You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
