dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize