my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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