Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
