at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
