I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
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When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize