It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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