Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
