So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
