Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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