My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
