hotel room ftw
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
