Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
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Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
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Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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