Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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