its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Randomize
