Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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